Ménage a Trois

“Now I know Sean is going to be involved and supportive, but, Alan, we think you should come along for this memorable journey.” This is one of the many endearing statements made by Florida Congresswoman Katherine Harris as she appeared on Hannity & Colmes last night. This interview makes me ask aloud, “Where do I start?” I caught part of it as we were flipping through news channels. In between various tributes to Peter Jennings, there was this bit of Fox News action. It almost makes me homesick for the absurdity that is the State of Florida…

Rep. Harris was in brilliant form. She was outlining how excited she was about announcing her bid for the Senate. This, I thought, was frightening enough. However, like a crazy car crash, I couldn’t divert my eyes long enough to ignore it. I was mesmerized and horrified at the same time. During her interview, it seemed like she was announcing her debut on Girls Gone Wild rather than the beginning of her Senate race. Throughout the interview she coos and wets her lips in a most “seductive” way as the warm Florida breeze blows her highlighted hair back…very Danielle Steele image, isn’t it? At one point during the interview, she even made Hannity look hot and flushed. It was nauseating. You may notice at several moments during the interview that Ms. Harris really seems to want to accentuate her heaving bosom – most of her interview is done with her standing in about a 45 degree angle. She also is squinting her eyes (or could this be the surgery du plastique) like she is ready to slither her way right into the laps of Hannity & Colmes and whisper sweet-nothing-at-alls in the ears of her gracious hosts.

To be honest, I am not quite sure what the purpose of this interview really was other than an opportunity for her to say how thrilled she was to have a chance to represent the reliable Floridian voters in Washington, DC. From what I could see, the only thing that seems soft about this interview was the line of questioning from H & C; questions like how she feels when people attack her about the way she looks or whether or not she is surprised that the Brothers Bush have not publicly endorsed her candidacy for Senate.

The whole time all I could think was that she must smell like a bad mixture of cheap gin and Jean Nate after-bath splash. Yuck.