Do Kiddies Really Suck Bad Elves?

Connecticut's Attorney General Richard Blumenthal thinks so. As such, he is defending the Liquor Control Division's decision not to allow the beer to be sold in the state. Actually it is the Liquor Control Division that's got issues -- the AG is simply doing his job defending their overweening meddling in commerce. Last time I checked, magazines like Weekly Reader and Highlights don't run liquor ads.

Apparently, no one seems to have a problem with Santa's Butt. After all, one is loathe in this day and age to make the fat acceptance crowd irate.

One wonders if the Board's sanction of ales marketed as "Christmas" brews constitutes an impermissible endorsement of religion. Will "Christmas" labels have to satisfy the "plastic reindeer" test?

Which brewmaker will have the courage to step up to the plate and peddle beer with Jesus's name and image on it? How couldn't a "Sacred Heart Lager" be a cultural sensation? Those under the age of 21 must remain content with slurping "Jesus Juice" -- and not the alcoholic Michael Jackson variety.