Did You Hear the One About the Kid Suicide Bombers?

John Vine, a senior Scottish anti-terrorism police officer, was the featured speaker last night at a "grand dinner attended by hundreds of Scotland's most eminent legal figures". His speech wasn't going over very well, so Vine veered from the script.

In an apparent attempt to rescue the situation, Vine took the fateful decision to tell a joke about bombs.

It may be popular in pubs and building sites, but the one about the al-Qaeda fathers comparing notes about the careers of their suicide bomber sons received a frosty reception among the great and the good of Perth.

And when he reached the punchline - "Ah, kids, they blow up so quickly these days" - sources say eyes widened in disbelief and many in the audience held their breath.

More here from the luminous Scotsman, which also generously includes other famous UK gaffes, including the time Tony Blair's wife asked a wheelchair-bound comedian if he performs stand-up.