Only the Abortion of 3,000 Babies a Day Can Cheer Me Up

Sigh. The House just passed legislation requiring my bank to spy on me and making it harder for me to gamble my money online. And Nebraska cops want to prosecute people who smoke around children for child abuse. But Nick Gillespie at Hit & Run has at least cheered me up with his post on a pro-life blogger who thinks an Onion article is real. It's a must read. Sadly, 535 commenters told the pro-life blogger that the Onion article was fake, but he continues to think the article is real. He even goes on to tell a story about a woman who is clearly screwing with him and he thinks she is totally serious. He just doesn't get it. Which is funny. Although not as funny as abortion itself.

President Clinton looks up from his desk in the Oval Office to see one of his aides nervously approach him.

"What is it?" exclaims the President.

"It's the Abortion Bill, Mr. President - what do you want to do about it?"

"Just go ahead and pay it."

Why is abortion so funny? Because you can't have an abortion without a dead baby. And where there's a dead baby, there's dead baby jokes.

What's worse than smoking pot with a baby? Making a bong out of the baby.

What's 18 inches long and makes women scream all night ? Crib death.

What's the difference between a dead baby and an onion. You don't cry when you chop up a dead baby.

What is the differance between a dead baby and a VHS tape? The VHS tape don't stink when you leave it out in the sun.

What's the difference between a baby and a bagel? You can put a bagel in the toaster. You have to put the baby in the oven.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby sitting next to a kid with down syndrome.

Tons of dead baby jokes here. Come on, you know you want to check the dead baby joke website out. Because that's how you are. Sick. You need help. Which is why I'll help you by linking to the dead baby joke website again here.