To the People

The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or TO THE PEOPLE.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Titty Tuesday

I know, I know. I should just move to Massachusetts and marry The Superficial already; but I don't want to be the guy that proves Santorum right (you know, if we allow men to marry other men, pretty soon people will want to marry their favorite blog, or if you're Davey Allday, a bottle of campari.) It would be a crying shame, however, if I didn't alert our readers to the following breastalicious posts.

1) First, someone who is clearly doing the lord's work snapped a picture of Victoria Beckham's right nipple as it slipped out of her top. Post and PG pics here. Uncensored nipply nipple here (NSFW). And she's with some creepy doesn't-know-he's-gay guy, who looks like Jim Dangle from Reno 911. Yeah, I would like to Reno her 911. Or stalk her until she calls 911. Or take her to Reno and crash my plane into her twin towers (what, too soon?). By the way, Jim Dangle's weapon of choice: "Preparedness is the most effective weapon...unless the guy has a bike chain."

2) Two, Scarlett Johansson loves her boobies. And so do you, admit it. Admit it! Judging by the size of her glasses, she must be blind as a bat. Which means I have a shot at her. At least until I open my mouth. No, she doesn't have bat-like hearing. I just say what's on my mind. And what's on my mind right now is that I would like to move to Massachusetts and marry her breasts. Not her, just her breasts. And if we get a divorce I want half of them. You know, for my collection of celebrity breasts. It's not as creepy as it sounds. It's creepier.

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