To the People

The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or TO THE PEOPLE.

Friday, October 13, 2006

Need Your Help, Sickos

This Halloween, Cherry Red Productions and The Lobster Boy Revue will join hipster forces to transform the creepy, craggy building next door to DC's Warehouse Theater into three floors of frightening and funny freakishness. They promise, "Torture. Murder. Shark attack. You'll scream your tits off!!". But, they need your help:

One of the scenes in this haunting haunted house will be "The Room Where Scary Words are Spoken!" For this, we need you to send us the most vile disgusting nasty rude ugly and offensive sentence, phrase, or other group of sounds you can think of. We will then pick the 30 worst and force FREAK HOUSE visitors to read them off to each other! So, please, put your office "dirty word" filter to the test, and, reply to this email with your horrible horrible phrase today!

You can send suggestions to

I'm submitting, "I would like to scoop out your eye with a spoon and fuck your cavernous ocular cavity”.

Loyal TtP reader - and freak - Jenny is submitting, "He massaged her back with her own bulimic excrement."

You know you want to suggest something vile.