Paris Gets Out of Jail

I have always wondered what it would be like to be in the slammer. The prison character I can most relate to is the white yuppie on Oz. Oz was a brilliant and scary HBO series and the white yuppie, who was in for a DUI-related death, was terrified in jail 24/7 and basically had to choose which prison gang, you know, had his way with him.

Maybe I am tougher than he was (in fiction), but my fear of prison has made me a religious taxi-taker. Paris Hilton had no such fear as she rang up two DUI's. Sadly, she has not been made to pay anywhere near the price that you and I would have had to if we had been pulled over. After just a few days in prison, in a single cell not afforded to other inmates, Hilton was released to home detention because of an undisclosed medical condition. It reminds me of being in high school and going to the nurse complaining of a stomach ache the same day a paper was due. Except that most other people cannot get out of prison for a stomach ache.