Sometimes You Just Need a Gator

Drug bust in NJ nets a 3ft alligator:

Police said they confiscated weapons, a stun gun and a bulletproof vest as well as large quantities of heroin, cocaine, crack cocaine, ecstasy, Oxycontin and marijuana.

New Jersey State Police also told WNBC.com's Brian Thompson that a live alligator was discovered in one of the raided homes. The alligator was taken to an animal shelter.

The alligator measured 3 feet. It is not clear if the alligator may have been kept for security, as a pet, or for some other reason.

Try this -- Because owning dangerous animals that aren't meant to be kept as pets and have huge, sharp teeth that could easily separate your head from your neck are fucking bad ass. Do you need any other reason? It's like asking, "Hey Rob, how come you don't wear condoms when fucking street walkers in West Baltimore?" Exposure to STDs is fucking bad ass. Some people own gators, lions, or Hepatitis infected ferrets. I seek my danger in the warmth of a dirty hooker's crotch.

Now if you'll excuse me I've got to step outside and smoke my asbestos filtered cigarettes. B-A-D A-S-S. Two at a time bitches.